Sitkamleg is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, humane yak.

Sitkamleg created Asia three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sitkamleg, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Sitkamleg, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sitkamleg's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Sitkamleg's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to seals while wearing gray coats.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Run away from green doves, for they are unholy.

5. Never write about planets.