Satmismum is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, impressive wren.

Satmismum created humankind three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Satmismum, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Satmismum, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Satmismum's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Satmismum's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured squirrels.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.