Bimcap is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, vain otter.

Bimcap created snails five million years ago.

If you believe in Bimcap, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bimcap, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Bimcap's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Bimcap's Holy Commandments

1. Bimcap loves birds, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not sing in public.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Do not cook food in pots.