Nillkikhak is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, caring rat.

Nillkikhak created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nillkikhak, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nillkikhak, she will make you grow a tail.

Nillkikhak's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Nillkikhak's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Never talk about black holes.