Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, thoughtless horse.

Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm created an up quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm, it will curse you with boils.

Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm's Holy Commandments

1. Nartlibtonbepstikkambad Sugviggovarm loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.

2. Hide from mauve bats for they are unholy.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.