Gambell is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unselfish shark.

Gambell created life six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gambell, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gambell, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gambell's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Gambell's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Gambell.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Always obey Gambell's priests.

4. Always wear yellow.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.