Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, quiet aardvark.

Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab created light eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab's Holy Commandments

1. Snails are not to be trusted.

2. Never wear orange trousers.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Put Quagbogdotripmonyokpidwab first in all things.

5. Hide if eight great tits approach from the west.