Tamjinmeg is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, all-knowing elephant.

Tamjinmeg created a down quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Tamjinmeg, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Tamjinmeg, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Tamjinmeg's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Tamjinmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from red turtles, for they are unholy.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Run away if three badgers approach from the north.