Bestgebbarnfigfabpib is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, passionate zebra.

Bestgebbarnfigfabpib created a down quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bestgebbarnfigfabpib, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bestgebbarnfigfabpib, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Bestgebbarnfigfabpib's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Bestgebbarnfigfabpib's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Erect six silver sculptures of Bestgebbarnfigfabpib on top of important buildings.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Pray towards the south.