Fasxenbem Pibcubpog is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, moody wren.

Fasxenbem Pibcubpog created gold four billion years ago.

If you believe in Fasxenbem Pibcubpog, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Fasxenbem Pibcubpog, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fasxenbem Pibcubpog's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Fasxenbem Pibcubpog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not dye your hair brown.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.