Tonwonfun is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, humane wyvern.

Tonwonfun created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonwonfun, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tonwonfun, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Tonwonfun's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Tonwonfun's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Hide if three doves approach from the west.

4. Always help tapirs in need.

5. Put Tonwonfun first in all things.
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