Soggedjip Fun is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, omniscient swallow.

Soggedjip Fun created oxygen five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Soggedjip Fun, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Soggedjip Fun, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Soggedjip Fun's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Soggedjip Fun's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Worship no other gods but Soggedjip Fun.

5. Never think about amino acids.