Yarlcatcab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, blissful centipede.

Yarlcatcab created a down quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarlcatcab, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Yarlcatcab, he will send you a sign.

Yarlcatcab's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Yarlcatcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Never wear magenta stockings.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Yarlcatcab.

4. Always help shrews.

5. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.