Vagpinsat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, awe-inspiring clam.

Vagpinsat created the planet Earth five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vagpinsat, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vagpinsat, it will think nothing of it.

Vagpinsat's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Vagpinsat's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never skip in the presence of manatees.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not wear violet clothing.