Vidflatrap is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, blissful penguin.

Vidflatrap created the planet Saturn four years ago.

If you believe in Vidflatrap, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Vidflatrap, she will remove you from existence.

Vidflatrap's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Vidflatrap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Always wear green.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never eat green fruit.