Cubarnbess is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, able troll.

Cubarnbess created the planet Saturn seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cubarnbess, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cubarnbess, she will send you a sign.

Cubarnbess' most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cubarnbess' Holy Commandments

1. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Never talk about sharks.

5. Do not dye your hair red.