Satontxem is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, thoughtless salamander.

Satontxem created the solar system five million years ago.

If you believe in Satontxem, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Satontxem, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Satontxem's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Satontxem's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Feed all hungry frogs.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not sit in public.

5. Do not chop down trees.