Bagpopnurt is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, fussy naga.

Bagpopnurt created an electron eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bagpopnurt, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bagpopnurt, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bagpopnurt's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Bagpopnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Bagpopnurt loves ants, so they must be respected.

5. Never talk about fire.