Flamkapzan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, competent mongoose.

Flamkapzan created humanity eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamkapzan, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Flamkapzan, she will come to you in dreams.

Flamkapzan's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Flamkapzan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill sheep.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Never paint your face indigo.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.