Toffudcissgilbad is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, pitiless bee.

Toffudcissgilbad created the Black Eye Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Toffudcissgilbad, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Toffudcissgilbad, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Toffudcissgilbad's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Toffudcissgilbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Hide from red tortoises for they are unholy.

3. Put Toffudcissgilbad first in all things.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Toffudcissgilbad.