Mottimbud is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, happy raccoon.

Mottimbud created carbon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Mottimbud, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Mottimbud, he will torture you forever.

Mottimbud's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Mottimbud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always help porpoises in need.

5. Run away if eight capybaras approach from the south.