Honcubfen is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring duck.

Honcubfen created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Honcubfen, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Honcubfen, he will cry a lot.

Honcubfen's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Honcubfen's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not shave your feet.