Betsashin is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, stupid aardvark.

Betsashin created a Higgs boson six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betsashin, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Betsashin, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Betsashin's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Betsashin's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Always wear magenta.

5. Never wear coats.