Flabbaffag is a god.
He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, amazing
jackal.
Flabbaffag created the planet Earth five thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Flabbaffag, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.
If you do not believe in
Flabbaffag, he will turn you into a goat.
Flabbaffag's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.
Flabbaffag's Holy Commandments1. Do not cook food in pots.
2. Always help eagles in need.
3. Run away from pink bats, for they are unholy.
4. Do not wear blue clothing.
5. Never paint your head mauve.