Gonnurlarttetti is a god.
He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, self-confident
yak.
Gonnurlarttetti created bats seven trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Gonnurlarttetti, he will ignore you forever.
If you do not believe in
Gonnurlarttetti, he will turn you into a slug.
Gonnurlarttetti's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.
Gonnurlarttetti's Holy Commandments1. Do not dye your hair green.
2. Never eat bark.
3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.
4. Always help rats.
5. Do not wear indigo clothing.