Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, dishonourable finch.

Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg created oxygen six million years ago.

If you believe in Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three sharks approach from the north.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Vegmanwon Kikwegbeg.

3. Never eat lemons.

4. Never sing near nematodes.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.