Limgumpak is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, awe-inspiring jaguar.

Limgumpak created an atom seven million years ago.

If you believe in Limgumpak, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Limgumpak, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Limgumpak's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Limgumpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan shoes.

2. Limgumpak must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

4. Do not speak about grapes.

5. Do not chop down trees.