Kimfumlist is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, egotistical camel.

Kimfumlist created tapeworms six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimfumlist, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kimfumlist, she will turn you into a worm.

Kimfumlist's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Kimfumlist's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Erect eight titanium sculptures of Kimfumlist on top of important buildings.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate capybaras.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.