Kon is a god.

He takes the form of a small, merciless snail.

Kon created water five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kon, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kon, he will torture you forever.

Kon's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Kon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about amino acids.

2. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Run away if three hamsters approach from the west.