Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, almighty hydra.

Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl created vertebrates two million years ago.

If you believe in Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Hakhatceb Jipsanddun Vogsidgudnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never feed figs to aardvarks while wearing gray boots.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.