Yamgumtun is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, egotistical centaur.

Yamgumtun created the world nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yamgumtun, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yamgumtun, he will not care.

Yamgumtun's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Yamgumtun's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in holy places.

2. Never eat nuts.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Yamgumtun.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.