Watzimxuck is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, cheerful hippopotamus.

Watzimxuck created the universe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Watzimxuck, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Watzimxuck, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Watzimxuck's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Watzimxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Watzimxuck loves snails, so they must be honoured.

2. Never mention turtles.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Always obey Watzimxuck's priests.
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