Gatfotarf is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, temperamental capybara.

Gatfotarf created gold three million years ago.

If you believe in Gatfotarf, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gatfotarf, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Gatfotarf's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Gatfotarf's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

2. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

3. Gatfotarf loves pigs, so they must be respected.

4. Do not wear yellow clothing.

5. Erect five titanium sculptures of Gatfotarf on top of important buildings.
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