Stipkonnad is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, weak bear.

Stipkonnad created the Cigar Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Stipkonnad, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stipkonnad, it will turn you into a dog.

Stipkonnad's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Stipkonnad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about monkeys.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Always help seals in need.

4. Worship no other gods but Stipkonnad.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.