Kamqueegstafsag is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, selfish capybara.

Kamqueegstafsag created the Sunflower Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kamqueegstafsag, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kamqueegstafsag, it will destroy your home planet.

Kamqueegstafsag's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Kamqueegstafsag's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Kamqueegstafsag eight times a day.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not take Kamqueegstafsag's name in vain.

5. Hide if seven tapirs approach from the north.