Jenhamlagkomkan is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, unsympathetic turtle.

Jenhamlagkomkan created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Jenhamlagkomkan, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Jenhamlagkomkan, she will make you grow a tail.

Jenhamlagkomkan's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Jenhamlagkomkan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Run away from purple badgers, for they are unholy.

3. Always help sick bats.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never write about cell theory.