Cimmidtof is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, bad-tempered goblin.

Cimmidtof created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cimmidtof, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cimmidtof, she will cry a lot.

Cimmidtof's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Cimmidtof's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

3. Never paint your neck purple.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always look after injured capybaras.