Matgessdud is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, blissful camel.

Matgessdud created matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Matgessdud, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Matgessdud, he will turn you into a plant.

Matgessdud's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Matgessdud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about amino acids.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Always treat bats with great respect.

4. Do not speak about spinach.

5. Always pray immersed in water.