Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unthinking cow.

Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab created a strange quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick foxes.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab.

3. You must love Hivsandlaggessandnarlvab.

4. Never think ill of sick geese.

5. Do not make images of living things.