Zedbudcun Catcipbep is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, amazing crow.

Zedbudcun Catcipbep created gold eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Zedbudcun Catcipbep, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zedbudcun Catcipbep, she will not care.

Zedbudcun Catcipbep's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Zedbudcun Catcipbep's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Erect four platinum sculptures of Zedbudcun Catcipbep on top of important buildings.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.