Fednartven is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unfair warg.

Fednartven created parasitic wasps five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fednartven, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fednartven, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fednartven's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Fednartven's Holy Commandments

1. Fednartven loves birds, so they must be honoured.

2. Always treat mites with great respect.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Fednartven loves frogs, so they must be respected.