Dusscepfodciss is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, wise guinea pig.

Dusscepfodciss created a quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dusscepfodciss, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dusscepfodciss, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Dusscepfodciss' most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Dusscepfodciss' Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always wear purple.

3. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always treat porpoises with great respect.