Bagaftappang Metwadnad is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, merciful finch.

Bagaftappang Metwadnad created the Large Magellanic Cloud six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagaftappang Metwadnad, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bagaftappang Metwadnad, it will turn you into a frog.

Bagaftappang Metwadnad's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Bagaftappang Metwadnad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never play with disobedient children.