Vigcinban is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, flying lion.

Vigcinban created humanity eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vigcinban, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vigcinban, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Vigcinban's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Vigcinban's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always treat pigs with great respect.

4. Retreat if five dolphins approach from the east.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.