Lidortvilcar is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, thoughtless alligator.

Lidortvilcar created an atom two million years ago.

If you believe in Lidortvilcar, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Lidortvilcar, she will send you a sign.

Lidortvilcar's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Lidortvilcar's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about amino acids.

2. Always help sick ants.

3. Worship no other gods but Lidortvilcar.

4. Lidortvilcar loves pigs, so they must be respected.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.