Yattgantin is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, irritating newt.

Yattgantin created a Higgs boson eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattgantin, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Yattgantin, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Yattgantin's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Yattgantin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill mice.

2. Never talk about squirrels.

3. Do not take Yattgantin's name in vain.

4. Yattgantin loves goats, so they must be honoured.

5. Never wear kilts.