Bifhughiv is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, omnipotent manatee.

Bifhughiv created a quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifhughiv, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bifhughiv, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Bifhughiv's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Bifhughiv's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Retreat if six monkeys approach from the east.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.

5. Never go into indigo rooms.