Quaftargbidarmmit is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, irritating armadillo.

Quaftargbidarmmit created a photon three million years ago.

If you believe in Quaftargbidarmmit, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Quaftargbidarmmit, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Quaftargbidarmmit's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Quaftargbidarmmit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt horses.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Quaftargbidarmmit loves hamsters, so they must be respected.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never pour water over plants.