Dibbinpin is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, narcissistic dugong.

Dibbinpin created the world two million years ago.

If you believe in Dibbinpin, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Dibbinpin, she will laugh at you.

Dibbinpin's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Dibbinpin's Holy Commandments

1. Dibbinpin must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always treat tapirs with great respect.

5. Do not cook food in pots.