Dabbogfit is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, selfish whale.

Dabbogfit created the solar system four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dabbogfit, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dabbogfit, it will turn you into a sheep.

Dabbogfit's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Dabbogfit's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Always obey Dabbogfit's priests.

4. Run away from gray squirrels, for they are unholy.

5. Always take life seriously.